The Fear of Restrictions on Access to Abortion.
Why is life like this? Is my body not mine?One of my rights has been taken away, and I am worried for my life.I wasn’t worried before because I didn’t believe it to actually occur.Until the day came, on June 24th.A right of women has been taken, and it has officially awakened the fear and…
All in Woman’s World
To the girl that was raped . . . And shamed for what she wore Punished nine months To carry a being she didn’t create At 12 years old She shoulders a parents weight Robbed of the childhood she was meant to have No thanks to the state To the mother who couldn’t be .…
Water Is Life
I bring this offering to the edge of the water in song. not in grief.Ash from the stories they attempted to burn, a muttered name, and a braid of sweetgrass.Water is life, says Mni Wiconi, yet they paved over prayers with selfishness and steel veins.She flows, nevertheless.My aunt’s eyes, the rough hands of the seed…
She Will Bark
A woman too afraid to tell a stoy Is equal to a dog too afraid to bark Woman building up the courage just for her words to be torn apart But with resilience comes strength And with strength comes wisdom Those words used to tear these women apart Will only help build them Women and…
Could I Be?
Mi Abuelita would always talk about a loss she had years ago right after mi Tia Sarita’s birth. Gemelos. La partera dijo que eran dos. After my Tia Nela’s birth- her very last birth at 41- mi abuelita had very heavy painful days monthly. No se podia ni levantar. She had to see the doctor…
Picture imperfect
I trust you Do you trust me ? It’s okay I promise I won’t show anybody your safe with me Don’t worry I put my trust in you Until everyone started to look at me different Until the whispers began Until I had unwillingly Shown myself to everyone Shutting myself in Was it all my…
My Flesh, His Fruit
Did Eve feel this way?A rush, a hunger, a moment of complete surrender?These sweet parallels,our desires–no different. It was never about an apple anyway.My skin is red, a ripe apple. Could it be nerves or just arousal?He softly holds my core,as my bits drip down his chest—I have never wanted anything more.A seed spills free,…
Echoes of Innocence
When night comes a silence is present,As I wonder within my mind,Your gaze illuminates the night like a beacon Of calm, eternal light, I wonder… if beneath the moon’s pale watchful eye, they whisperednames, they wove the lie. A silver halo on the darkened land, where it witnessed her light, a truth they could not…
A Women’s Silenced Cries
From an early age, we’re told what’s right “Don’t do this”, “Don’t wear that” “Be like them and blend in” But why must I do what society says, When my heart feels a different way? Am I not enough to live life my way? They tells us how to speak, how to be And silence…
“The Honor of Being a Woman”
Deep inside a woman’s womb There is life being brought to lifeThe rhythm of nature The rhythm of creating a masterpiece The power being held in someone’s hands Releasing tiny seeds that wait patiently Each egg whisper of life yet to beBeautiful and floreshing bump yet to beCries, cries, pains pains, yet beautiful power being…
Where Justice Blooms
Pink carnations bow their headsas the past reveals what lies aheadThe woman dreams of justiceHer voice cuts like glass, clear and sharp with purposeShe was once a silent mist amidst the flamesbut now you can’t dismiss herShe’ll make the proper preparationsAdvocate for what is rightPut up a fightPack the posters and pocket her letterswhile hair…
The Uncertainty
The thought of having an abortion is scary to any woman, let alone someone who is in their early twenties, and having to come close to having to make that decision. As a person who grew up in a very traditional Hispanic household, the topic of having sex always consisted of being a sin and…
Nada Mas Que Decir (Nothing Left To Say)
Queridx Juanito, So many words left unsaid, So Many Memories, So Many Dreams, So Many Laughs. I never told you how much your strength carried me through and what your sisterhood meant to me during our time in ICE Detention. As the world was entering a frightening pandemic nightmare, we were living our immigration nightmare.…
Learning From My Past
AttentionSomething that I have craved for so longAttentionSomething that I no longer wantAttentionI have learned from the past and need to shareI am no longer a child and can see a future ahead of meA universal problem that yet feels so personal I kept thinking inside my own little bubbleBurst, I can see clearly all…
Women are Not Objects
Abortion has been around for a while, since the most ancient times. One of the first records of an abortion was from 1550 BCE Egyptian Ebbers Papyrus. For those times, it was a different reason why many women then got an abortion. Most of them were because they were high-end women being told to hide…
“What Is It Like to Be a Woman?”
I hear two men chucklingas I pick something up for them.I feel wandering eyes,baring into my skin and bones.I hear my dad’s sexual commentsabout girls my age. (I was fourteen.)I see a woman,never noticing the phone up her skirt.I hear my dad and my uncles,cheering on my cousin’s catcalling.I see my new friend’s message,tired of…
The Woman is not a Flower
Who is she?I am a nineteen-year-old woman, I say woman because I’ve found that as a sex we are discredited too often.I am a woman, along with all the younger and older.I’ve never felt more sure of my womanhood than when I write my true authentic thoughts. When here and now, I am allowed to…
Rainbow Baby
In a very small religious town, there was a 16-year-old girl named Ana. She had such a huge heart and deeply believed in love at first sight. Ana met an abusive guy from whom she constantly sought validation. She soon found out she was pregnant, and he did everything in his power to leave her,…
your choice is not my choice
i feel you getting closera blaze of hot breaththe stickiness of your skinyour pungent cologneyou pull me closermy stomach is curdling panties ripped off viciously the primitive nature of “man.”screeching nothing comes out “you’re so tight.”hands wrapped around my throatthrusting harder and harder disappearing into obscurityi’m nothingan orifice seated on the toilet one hand with…
If others can have it, why can’t I? The importance of contraceptive knowledge.
Liz is a teenager in highschool, she’s a great student, cheerleader and overall a great person. She never caused trouble and complied with her parents’ rules, including not passing bed times, not being alone with her boyfriend, keeping up her good grades etc. Her parents did not really like the idea of Liz having a…
Celebrating Choice: A Reproductive Justice Ode
In the realm of rights, a crucial plea,Reproductive justice, let it be free.A canvas of choice, a tapestry fair,Every voice matters, in the rights we declare.No judgment, no shackles, let autonomy thrive,In the garden of justice, where hopes revive.For every person, a path to decide,Reproductive justice, let compassion be our guide.Beyond the debates, in the…
Breaking Expectations
When I was young, I was told that women should always be pure and proper. Women shouldalways speak politely and softly.Women should not wear a lot ofmakeup. Women should dressplainly and modestly. Women shouldnever talk back to those with authority.I was told that I have to abide by these rules otherwise, I would be considered…
Unbreakable Voices
In the annals of history, a tale unfolds,Of women’s strength and stories untold.From the shadows, they emerged with might,To claim their place in the world’s grand sight.Once confined to domestic walls,Now breaking barriers, standing tall.They fought for rights, for equality,To shape a future where all could be free.With courage as their guiding light,They challenged norms,…
My late abuela story
My late abuela. Victim of medical racism. A little backstory. After six years of my abuela passing, about two years ago, I was told by my tia that my abuela had an abortion, and there was a story as to why she did what she did. First, my Abuelos migrated from Mexico to the U.S.…
What Women Means to Me: A Collection of Haikus
My mother wakes meIn the middle of the dayShe works hard for meI am a womanOf course I feel the waterTowards me I drownAmong her presenceThe flower blooms and withersWhen she walks by meLittle one she seesPainted face rosy red cheeksOrbs linger at dusk I chose to do various haikus for my contribution to the…
Medicated Racism: Nuestras Abuelas
Our ancestors migrated to the United States hoping for a better livelihood and the prospect of planting generations of family trees. During the 1970s, the mothers of East LA were starting their lives with their families. Freshly in their twenties, young and in love. They put their trust in the American medical system to deliver…
Rite of Passage, Victim of Torture
Circumcision is a rite of passage.A man, Once a boy,Is now considered a warrior.A milestone forever imprinted in his book of life. His sovereignty.His pride. ~~~~~Circumcision is mutilation.A patchwork quilt, Once a woman,Is now sexually unappealing.A brutish act to prevent temptation.Her imprisonment.Her shame. Though these poems can be read as one poem, in which both…
Why Was I Born a Woman?
If you asked my ancestors? they’d whisper in the wind,A legacy of resilience, through every twist and turn.I carry their strength, their stories, their grace,Born as a woman, a continuation of their sacred space.If you asked my father? he’d look in my eyes and smile with pride.“A daughter born not just to bear his name,But…
Reclamation
My journey with my sexuality is ongoing and has been affected by many factors and lived experiences. I come from a family that was riddled with poverty and substance use. When I was a small child, my mom married a man she met through an ad in PennySaver named Alex. The life we began to…
Unmothering
I inform the madres that I will not mother, while my kneelocked nerves shake. They mourn the unconceived. Not a henbasket of eggs. I will not bust my breast to feed feed feed breakfast to chickchildren that will never be. My days spent with the click-clucking of a clock that has no biological argument with…
Who’s Watching
I spend time alone in the dark loving myself feeling emotions Turned on by the vulnerability of those I am watching Setting a private moment with a private browser to watch a private movie with sexy secrets an unspoken fantasy and attraction to unruled and freely expressed pleasure But when I am hiding to touch…
fine dining
let’s start with drinks, that are our kisses which temporarily quench our thirst. we move on to the appetizer, engaging in foreplay, teasing each other because we’re insatiable. my breasts are your first plate, plump for you to have your first bite, brushing your tongue on my hard nipples. i take you in my mouth,…
Phased
I felt the spirits calling “The rain is coming this way.” How do you know? he asked because gravity was beginning to pull and I was beginning to sway “Those clouds over there are getting darker…” I didn’t say it was because I could feel it stirring inside me storm clouds growing, gathering at my…
Chingona Recovery Chronicles
I was a sad girl before I would drink and drink till I passed out But sad girl am I no more They called me a chingona, pero inside I was still triste. I thought I’d find the solution to todas mis problemas at the bottom of the Miller lite can Pero The answers never…
I Am
I am all woman Hear me roar Feel the ground move as I glide Hips going and flowing Side to stride My body is the ocean If you drown That’s on you My waves aren’t meant to be small I cannot downplay the truth You see As the sea I no longer struggle Effortlessly being…
Music, Movement, CLIMAX
When the music starts my body moves… The beat dictates the way my body responds. And when it’s my JAM there is an excited twerk then my body starts to match the beat. Oh and when that bump and grind music comes. My hips start to wind, my body starts to roll, my butt starts to…
THE ARRIVAL
I dig for Pieces of my heart That I buried To keep myself safe As cold earth flies through the air I’m reminded of childhood Where I buried myself in the sand To feel warm and hugged Keep this part of me safe, Pachamama I’ll be back in the spring As tree limbs stretch out …
Uncertainty
My eyes can’t see The emptiness so big Others guide me I don’t know the path I’m sinking Struggling against the tide Fighting for certainity In an ocean filled with fiction I’m seeking reason My voice blends With an uncanny whisper Fear speaks to my vanity Soon, the sobs, They morph into waves And… Im…
Mi Casa
All my life I’ve craved love I yearned for a void in me to be filled A place to feel safe and seen When your love found me the fear clouded my happiness I spent years running from a love A love I felt unworthy of I never knew happiness could exist like this I…
Manifest for a Young Artista
I am a poet I am a woman I am a body possessed with spirits. I am encapsulating a million different avenues of creation. I am becoming angelic, monarchic- unfurling my gossamer wings. I will achieve the dreams of a million young me’s. I will dream new dreams for the young me’s whose time will…
Lista Para Sanar
Una tormenta Lluvia cristalina Lista para sanar Lista pa’ celebrar. Una muxer Sirena al nacer Nada a su anden Nada con su ser. Energía continua Siempre evolucionando Re-creando pasos Re-creando espacios. Una chispa Brinca – danzón Baila al conpaz Baila al mas allá. Fuego alumbra En llamas, pasión Nueva leña Nuevo encanto. Agüas infinitas Rodean…
Rooted
Hay días que requieren Excavar Buscar Y recordar El ser que era Antes que el mundo Habia interferido Descending to the Sacred fortress I go Amparando me De raices De otro mundo Tan profundo Que te llevan A todos los ayer-es Tlatlauhtia Means Prayer In Nahuatl Language that was stolen From my Tongue But not…
Womb
Her sun kissed hand delicately places an owl feather on top of white embroidered linen Marigold and rose petals float through the air landing on sticky honey dipped apples Gusts of wind caress the house Shadows dance with wafts of cinnamon incense smoke Black and white pictures of ancestors frozen in time speak untold stories…
Visions From Mictlán: A Journey Into the Abyss
I want a life I don’t dread waking up to. I am still processing the last 2 years. I am still adjusting to my new home. I have to acknowledge where I really am. I am still trying my best to be a good parent, but don’t know what the right thing to do is.…
Turquoise Serpent
She did not fight or flee, to survive the fawn froze ~*~ Turquoise serpent winds my way turns at an ankle, rises round a thigh now upon my shoulders, a lethal shawl my arms extend lightly feet plant in warrior stance the north wind enters and the dance begins slowly, she wraps around my torso…
Untitled
Father comes over. I show him a book. Written in Mixteco and Spanish. I ask if he could read it in dialecto. He tries and says there are many regions and many dialects. He tries and says no. His dialect Zapoteco Is different. We sit and talk about language. We always talk about language. I…
Reflections in an Isle of Yarn
I am standing in the craft store searching for the exact green used by my Abuelita. She has been making Christmas stockings for all the kids in the family since I was a baby. She even made one for my partner when he and I were married. She made them for my first two children,…
Sacrament
The merciful line up before god eyes downcast pebbles underneath their tongues They offer dirt, glass and the blood dried in the grooves of their soles Sun cuts through stained glass ignites the perfume and gold marking division The priest appears a shadowed figure draped in silk his words pierce the gathered and leave no…
We Are Medicine
Abuelita’s songs of loss and solitude bathe her in ceremonial sound marigolds tremble nearby Mama’s fiery prayers for deliverance vibrate from her heart center onto her children’s skin My sharpened pencil picks colonial locks out flutters truth in sparkling flames ancestor’s ashes rest
A Moonlight Toast to the Women who Raised Me
Queridas Mom, Nana, On the eve of Día de los Muertos, I imagine you in two wicker chairs, positioned outside a beachside house that overlooks the shores of Luquillo. You’re drinking coffee, decaf as always, made sickly sweet with caramel creamer. The soft breeze delivers a chill. You hug your bodies tighter in your shawls. …
Coatlicue Calling
Can you overdose on anxiety and exhaustion? I came pretty close Had to be resuscitated by love and strength Had to bring me back to life Had to bring me back to focus Had to remind myself Stress is not my identity Anxiety does not define me “I don’t ever wanna feel like I did…
Hidden Curriculum I
First day. First class. First nerves. First questions. How early is too early to get to class? Fifteen? Twenty? Thirty minutes? Lista to camp out in front of the classroom. Mami always said, “Nunca llegues tarde al escuela.” I’ll figure it out. The professor must’ve seen through my “perfect student” mask. Can I ask a…
I’m Here
Gentle hands caressing the hair of my future generations, their heads gently laying in my lap, tears wetting my legs. They’re safe. Whimpers and fears falling down their cheeks, they wonder if they’re strong enough for this. They’re safe. They tell me they’re unsure they tell me they’re afraid. I tell them they’re safe. They…
My Father’s Last Request
I hesitate to tell this story, to share with the world the last conversation I ever had with my father. I have told some people, but to really put it out to the world? I think I am afraid if I tell the world, the world will hold me accountable to what he said. You…
Energía Luna
Mmmm This moon has got me feeling high Natrurally high Full of energy Craving cocoa goddesses food Singing at the top of my lungs Wanting to run Needing to dance As I shed what I no longer need And create new energy Full of positive thoughts I create my intentions To further my love Of…
Está Bien No Estar Bien
TW: Mention of Suicide In order to find peace of mind, one must lose it first… I never imagined I’d be diagnosed with borderline personality disorder… But I know I have never been okay. When people ask me where home is, I don’t know what direction to turn to. I don’t even know who…
De Regreso
I couldn’t ignore her voice. The one that got louder and louder each day. The one that yelled through as I drowned her out. In hopes to make her quieter and quieter. But she only got more creative. She crawled through my bones— making a home in my left hip. Reminding me every day that…
Where You Sit In Church Says A Lot About You
The church pews have been replaced. This is a slight shock to me. Tomorrow is the baptism, leaving me, the madrina, to meet with the church staff to make sure no one sits up front except us and the rest of the family. I imagine holding baby Cecile, not even a month old, and losing…
Travel Diary: One Coffee and an Epiphany to Go
Baños, Ecuador, Jan 2008 I’m sitting alone in a coffee shop in Baños, Ecuador with my tablet, notebook and pen watching the rainfall. It’s a gloomy morning just like the previous days and the atmosphere is both calm and chaotic. People are rushing in trying to stay warm and dry. And then there’s me, with…
Her Three Reflections
I Mamá chiquita plays naked in the arroyo while the women wash clothes downstream. She dips her small hands in, then out of crystal-clear water. They become smooth, like the silver stones at her feet. She imagines herself being fully transformed by the moving stream, her skin now glittering under the midmorning sun. Sparking energy…
Go Fly
Become a moment in a different time Go fly Among feelings of rest At home in the body Into the folds of their freedom Flying over ourstory Golden gliding feathers Feelings of rest would manifest a silence Flying over ourstory Over a land I already know Feelings of rest would manifest insight Of…
Ofrenda
Mujer I am the daughter of the 5th Sun Looking for the promised one Ven a mi I am the everlasting weeping willow tree resembling your abuela bearing infinite rings of wisdom Escucha me I am the mother of the earth Nourishing Replenishing the hole Tu madre A brisk breeze Before the storm A carefree…
Silver Owl
I welcome the guide of the highest truth and compassionTo take me with you tonight I’ve lost sight and all Passion Sitting on the corner of my bedAll hope was lostI stared at the wall Nothing I saidNothing at all I laid my head back, my attention to the ceilingI said “Please take me now, I…
Diosa: A Liberation Prayer
I am a saint.⠀ I am a sinner.⠀ I am a queen.⠀ Powerful, like one hand open, ready to receive; the other, a clenched fist, ready to strike if necessary.⠀ I am a fighter; the end all be all.⠀ I am like a rose, beautiful and sharp when touched without permission. ⠀ I don’t pray…
Body Issues
Listen, I have body issues. I have an issue with how my body is watched, judged, and spoken about.⠀⠀⠀⠀ I have an issue with how my body is policed and taxed simply because I happen to be born with a uterus. I have an issue with how most store-bought clothes don’t fit my long and…
Primera Avenida – La Casa de Adobe – Guatemala
Un recuerdo de Magda Dubon-McSparran I could see my Abuelita Juana from a distance as I walked up the cobblestone street. She stood at the front door of her home with her arms crossed. She was tall and thin. She wore a tailored dress made from a floral fabric that my father sent to her…
First Position
She held onto the barre next to her, making sure not to grip too tightly. Holding her breath as she waited for the movement to begin. Shoulders down, chin up, ribs in. Soft hands, soft gaze. Make it look easy. In that moment- between one heartbeat and the next- she felt stillness. A stillness that…
Dreaming, Healing and Liberation
Healing Through Dreamwork For as long as I can remember, I’ve always been a soñadora. No, not like the novela. I mean an active dreamer. I thought everyone was because I remember being a little girl and listening to my abuelita and mami talking about their dreams. Sometimes they’d wake up in the middle of…
Salsa de Chisme, de Mi Querida Abuela
My mom was there and my dad was there. we were in this place, it was very warm and there was a tint of amber. I couldn’t see who was speaking, but someone told us that they were going to wake up Abuelo and Abuela. I was confused because they had both passed on. but…
Set Magia Free
Magia is living breathing particles of lights that exist in our blood that has been able to break reality with unexplainable events that only happen in books or in one’s wild imagination. Like when a rose grows from concrete or putting emotion while making food so much so one can experience this emotion by consuming…
Ancestral Guidance from the Plant Realm
A month ago I had a conversation with friends about their origin stories in dance. One mentioned the first bodily acknowledgment of this affinity happened when they got goosebumps from hearing music. Of course, this person did not expect dance to touch their life so strongly, nor did they necessarily choose the circumstances that introduced…
Chicana
Brown but not Brown Enough My tongue does not roll with flame Sorry “No habla espanol” Born here and my parents are the same We have different fights but still just as tough I am Mexican I am American I am Chicana No more Judgement No more Shame Our ancestors are one in the sa …
A letter to a loved one
Although I never met you in the physicalI knew you through your sisters, brother in law, and all of the family I have the pleasure of knowingThrough your family I have learned so muchabout life and cherishing every day and momentand I can only hope to aspire to reach an internal state of tranquility and…
You Lied
Too many times to count. I believed each and every line you said to me. I drank them all up. You were water And I was parched. Your lies showered me Covered me in a blanket And tucked me into bed My gut tugging at me to wake up But I was warm It wasn’t…
Before
I was your favorite “A work of art …” the way you looked at me .. carefully examining each layer like I was a masterpiece . A puzzle waiting to be discovered . Piece by piece .. you’d take me apart . And I loved it .. the rush .. the suspense .. your presence…
After
I decided to love myself The kind you hear about in books But this time, I did the work. I searched inward – Began to question messages , observed actions. I filled my empty spaces.. I dug out the poison and planted seeds of love. I was becoming whole. My mind detoxed; Who is…
Open
Keep them closed you say My lips My tears My legs Unless They are put around…to agree or swallow Let out a river…to beg Opened wide…so you can take Until you are the one pleased and in possession. What if I choose To put my lips around my words and shout my truths To cry…
Nuestro
Without fear, nuestro hogar sería a standing (in)vitation. Loss and grief would be welcome in nuestro hogar. We would share food at a table we built with nuestras manos, from trees our grandparents planted. Without fear, está lo sagrado, nuestro sagrado.
she told me
she doesn’t want to write of heartbreak anymore she doesn’t want sorrow to be the topic she knows best she wants to forget about the darkest room of her soul – the place where her pen and paper help build a window to escape she doesn’t want to write about the rainy days or the…
La semilla
Somos pobres, somos ricos,Somos ricos, somos pobres.El peso cae encima. Me entrego a mi voz profunda.Encrucijada, sentada con la viejitaCon su reboso negro,Escucho su lamento.Que por sorpresa sale de mi boca, Somos ricos, somos pobres,Somos pobres, somos ricos.El peso cae encima. La viejita me encaminaEntre milpa.Mija, entierra el cuento,Me dice.Que por sorpresa sale de mi…
mi hada madrina vive en Tijuana
en un apartamento pequeño que luce cojines extravagantes pinturas con tonos de joyas y un gato blanco que le gusta cuando canta opera mi hada madrina luce uñas acrílicas cuando maneja el autobus que me lleva a la escuela mi hada madrina vive desplazada de un hogar estable me saluda cuando camino al mandado y…
