TW: Mention of Suicide
In order to find peace of mind, one must lose it first…
I never imagined I’d be diagnosed with borderline personality disorder…
I know I have never been okay.
When people ask me where home is,
I don’t know what direction to turn to.
I don’t even know who I am.
I know my parents have always done what they could so that I may live a happy life,
When I contemplate suicide,
And cut my thighs,
And attempt to strangle myself,
I wish my madre linda wouldn’t tell me to suck it up.
I know this is supposed to be a piece about protection, grounding, and falling gently,
But this is my reality;
This is what I live every single day.
People say that there’s always a rainbow after every storm,
But I think they tend to forget that it doesn’t minimize the destruction it caused;
And I somehow,
Have made peace with that.
I’m okay with not being okay.